If You’re Friend Is An Introvert, Here’s What You Should Know
All my Introverts out there raise your hand! The blogging world is filled with them! So I know many of my comrades may be reading this right now but this is for your friends who may not be an Introvert because it can be difficult to have a friendship with us. That is why I thought this wisdom might help a lot of people.
You guessed Right, Heidi Is An Introvert
I do write about Introverts a lot and basically, because I know a lot about this and I’m not just feeding you the popular line, I tested 78% which is pretty damn high. I believe most people are somewhere in the middle but even then it can be a thing in your relationships.
So here’s the story: I met up the other day with a friend of over ten years and she is one of my favorite people in the world, everything about her is beautiful. That being said, being with her tends to remind me of being inside an electric tornado. She has the latina spirit in full force. Extrovertyness on steroids!
Those are the people I like to go out with and as you read on you’ll understand why. But back to the story. As she was explaining me to her fiancee she must have said I am shy ten times and that I don’t like people which really cemented the WTF look on my face because I really thought at that moment that she didn’t know me at all. Upon some more thought, I realized it is possible that is how an Introvert comes across to a lot of people and we can’t actually blame them. It inspired me to write this post.
Introverts Are Not Shy!
I may have been shy as a child but today I am about as far from shy as you can get. Ask any of the people in my life or even my online friends, I am very direct and assertive. I have said in the past that If I decide to make you my friend, you will fall in line. Giggle.
I have found that an Introvert isn’t shy so much as we tend to not be about small talk as much, we are the observers. If you ask my friends they will probably say I never stop talking but the truth is I am quiet and tend to only talk a lot around people I trust. Small talk is one of those things that often makes me feel awkward.
Introvert Much?Click To Tweet
One of the reasons I have found male friends to be a better fit for me is because I don’t really do small talk or meaningless conversation well and I find men to be more direct. Introverts understand the importance of energy and speaking when something needs to be said.
We Totally Love People
This perhaps is the biggest misconception about an Introvert. We like people, we are not hiding from them. The difference is that groups of people exhaust us quicker and we like to be alone. I am totally of this mindset, I very much like being alone but I do also like being with people. That being said I would be a fringe person. What does that mean?
Well, let’s take parties as an example. I like parties but I might be the one a little off to the side watching or just soaking up the atmosphere. For me, it’s like the best of both worlds. I can be around the energy and not get overwhelmed. That being said I admit I prefer smaller groups of people and many of us do.
So how do you maintain a friendship with an Introvert?
Here are some tips that might help.
First of all, you have to understand their needs. My bestest friend in the world is a perfect example of this. Adry and I became friends around 5 years ago and she approached me. I’ll be honest I didn’t really take her seriously, she is 20 years younger than me and I pretty much thought she was a party girl and what on earth would we have to talk about?
Well, it turned out to be the best friend of my life. It turned into what didn’t we talk about and more than that within the first week she totally got me. She planned our outings and hanging out according to what made me comfortable and I didn’t even have to tell her. So the moral of this story is if you value the relationship you may have to make compromises. Today we are separated by Countries but still maintain a closeness I have with no other.
You have to expect that there will be periods of time you just don’t hear from your Introvert friend. I have this problem with family and friends. I’m not really good at staying in contact. I hate talking on the phone and rarely even answer it. So you may find you are the one constantly reaching out but you have to understand we really don’t do it on purpose.
It isn’t easy to have a relationship with an Introvert but I will tell you we get the important things and are loyal friends to the end! Do you have an Introvert in your life? Let’s talk about it