How To Deal With Hard Life Changes
Are You going through difficult life changes? Let me just tell you I feel your pain! This has been a whirlwind year for me, so many things have happened it’s amazing my head didn’t explode and yes there has been stress like you can’t even imagine but along with that stress, I continue to everyday gain more clarity into who I am and who I am becoming.
Last year, after being estranged for over ten years from my mother, she became seriously ill. I pretty much just dropped my beef and went flying off to Philadelphia to be with her and have been back and forth often. She has been near death many times so you can imagine the stress that came with that but what also came was a light bulb reckoning with my life.
I came to realize that I wasn’t making the most of my life and it was the time that I did because we never know what can happen. The other day as I was completely stressed I got to thinking about change and I realized some amazing things we don’t often consider.
Too many times we know we have to make changes and there is one thing that stands in our way Fear. For too many of us fear prevents us from living fully. It is scary because there are always risks involved with any life change you make. Probably because of my vagabond life people may think I am fearless, I am not. I have started over more times than most people, I know, but there has been fear and lots of it and what I realized was my need to stay safe and inside the box has prevented me from having the life I could.
I watch this everyday, It is an amazing speech everyone should see, found on Youtube
There will be pain. Another reason we avoid a life change we know we should make is we don’t want to hurt people. That’s natural right? A good deal of the time in life, we go out of our way, change ourselves and our dreams to avoid hurting people. The thing is you are only affecting the right now and ignoring the fact that you can’t stop what’s coming. People will get hurt and there will be pain.
Something strange I thought about as I was making my plan, was we basically go through life changes about every ten years. If you take the time to think about who you are now, opposed to your twenties, you will see that we constantly make life changes and at times, change is forced on us by circumstance and we survived. It is part of growing.
Online you might have seen me and thought I was a very social person and you couldn’t be more wrong, the truth is, I have mostly been a loner in life. For myself and I am sure many of you as well, have been disappointed a lot by people and sometimes you come to a point where relying on others isn’t an option for you. I admit one of the things I have the most trouble with is asking for help and leaning on other people.
What happened though, is a few people came out strong for me without even asking. These people know who they are and how they have humbled me and even made me feel a little overwhelmed. You absolutely have to be open to receiving help when it comes. None of us are ever truly alone.
In closing, be your own hero! I follow Tony Robbins a lot because he inspires me. He and a few others say that you can achieve anything but your life must include action. Realizing you need change is only the first step, take action for yourself, because without it you will never manifest your dreams. The magical thing about life is we can change anything, life is hard but nothing is impossible.