What You Should Stop Saying If You Want Happiness

A Few Words That Sabotage Your Happiness

Just the other day I got this idea in my head and it wouldn’t leave, ok that’s called every day and there’s a million or so of them but this one just kept attacking my brain. We always talk about damaging words in the Relationship Mentoring arena but those are words we say to other people. I thought, what about the self-sabotaging talk we engage in all the time that actually plays a role in our happiness.

Words have power, immense power they can hurt people, make them feel happiness and even have the power to change our lives. I remember someone once saying to me they thought I could do anything. Not pretty, not smart, they really felt as if I was powerful enough to pull anything off and I’ll tell you I haven’t talked to that person in years but those words changed my life.

This got me to thinking of all the words or phrases that get used every day without a thought that leaves such a legacy on our happiness and overall mental well-being.

Let’s Take A Walk Down Never Street

How many things do we say which have never attached to them? Way too many. The thing about never phrases is it is basically negative and lying to oneself which attacks our happiness and presto negative words equal negative thoughts. Let’s see:

  • I’ll Never Get Married (again)
  • I’ll Never Drink (again)
  • I’ll Never Move To The South (mmmhmm)
  • How Come You Never
  • I Have Never

The lie basically is as soon as you say never its gonna happen!



Always And Forever

Does that song stay in your head even now? I can’t stand it and basically because there’s no such thing as always or forever. I think the worst thing you can do in life is make promises. I used to make promises to my kids all the time but you never know when something is going to happen. Always is a promise so if you say something like “I always take out the trash”, you now have to take out the trash every time. Ohhh the pressure!

Maybe it’s cynical but I have never known anything that has lasted forever. We don’t even survive forever so how would we even know if something is forever…jus saying



The Everything Of Nothing

This is the big lie, am I right? Umm, where should we start? I got it “Nothing Is Wrong”. We all know that if someone says nothing is wrong, something is definitely wrong so it’s like the word itself is twice as negative. Nothing which should mean zilch, zero, nada actually means the opposite.

I Am A Reformed What-Iffer

This is more of an eternal dialogue we have with ourselves but it really puts forth a feeling of inpending doom and what’s even worse is there is no answer whatsoever. We will never know what if because it hasn’t happened, may never happen and yet we allow these two words to stress us out.

I’m Fine

So this is my most hated word. Fine is so blah, no matter how you use it, it always seems like you’re just saying it to avoid saying how you really feel. It’s a boring filler word. If I ask how I look and someone says I look fine I know I look eh just okay. How are you? I’m Fine, basically, means either you’re just ok or you don’t want to tell me and I know you don’t want to tell me.


6 words you need to stop saying if you want to be happy


Why do words have power? Because they make us feel things. Negative words and phrases really have the power to make us feel unhappy. Think about that the next time you’re talking to someone. We all need to think about what we say and the weight it carries! Use positive words to boost everyone’s happiness!


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11 Comments on "What You Should Stop Saying If You Want Happiness"

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If you ask the standard Irish person “how are you” wich is basically the Irish way of saying “hello” you will get in 99.9999% the answer “not too bad” which I hate as much as you do “I´m fine”. Both sentences (greeting and answer) could mean so much, but neither of them are truly meant .


Yes!! Really good ones. I think the “I’m fine” is so common and it’s just a knee jerk answer instead of opening up because you’ll feel like a Debbie Downer. I’m 100% guilty of that one! I find it to be an even bigger problem in everyday situations – I found myself doing it with our realtor, mortgage lender, etc during this house problem, and I’d have to catch myself and let them know there really was a problem.

Shari E

This is so true. Words can change your perspective on things — especially the ones you say to yourself in your mind. Thanks for this post.

Bren | A Splash of Cray

This is one FINE post! LOL I totally get it. The NEVER thing is a pain in the balls. Just don’t say it. It’s that easy. Forever, for me, means as long as I live. Words can have such a big part in our decisions, almost jinx ourselves with some. Do you remember saying something and quickly “knocking on wood” so it wouldn’t happen. Yeah, I still do that!


Shakirah Iman

I have been very bad about the negative self talk. I feel 90% of my issues with who I am is because of my self talk. I have done a great job of cutting it back when it comes to my looks but I am still bad about telling myself I am not doing enough, I am not good enough.


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